I've decided on my mutant power
Just saw X-men 3. Overall I enjoyed it: although it lacked the lightness of touch of the Singer movies it still packed quite a punch, and I did enjoy a few of Wolverine's scenes in particular. (For those who've seen it, I very much liked the fight with the guy who could re-grow his arms...) Surprising body count as well.
However, the film was marred for me slightly by the absolute fuck-wits in the cinema with me. What sort of pond-scum, what being whose IQ actually heads bravely into negative numbers, what waste of human potential thinks it a good idea to make a couple of phone calls while watching a movie? Why did the parent of the small child not prevent it sending those text messages? Why bring your girlfriend to the movie if you're going to have to spend the whole time explaining it to her, and not even think to whisper while you're about it?
Working front of house in a theatre as I do, I can say that it is the job of any usher in the West End to tell people to turn off their phone or keep quiet, and if a person consistently refuses to do so they'll be removed. Can someone explain to me why this doesn't happen in cinemas?
If I was a mutant my ability would be to transport any such people to a small island, but not a nice one like Lost. Maybe somewhere in the Outer Hebrides, or a large iceberg off the coast of Greenland.
-You're going to that special hell reserved for child molesters and people who talk in the theatre.
posted by corin @ 2:14 pm
2 Comments:
A few years ago, I was in a cinema (watching a Bette Midler film, so I only have myself to blame) when I became aware of a low-level buzz of talk behind me. I did the usual thing: attempt to ignore (10 minutes); intermittent tutting and sighing (10 minutes); hard stare (one, but what use is that in the dark?); final, hissed "will you please stop talking". I realised then that the noise was coming not from kids, but from some ladies of mature years.
It worked for about five minutes, then the buzz resumed. And I suddenly realised that what I was hearing was a running translation of the dialogue for someone who didn't speak English.
And while we're here - why is such audience delinquence more common in cinemas than theatres?
"why is such audience delinquence more common in cinemas than theatres?"
Well Tim, that's easy. It's because theatre audiences are more, well, well-to-do. Proof is that fact no one ever half-inches the interval drinks. Imagine doing the same in the cinema.
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